catherinelando's

summer school

2010-11-14T12:52:00.002+07:00

dari bulan kemarin udah iseng-iseng nyoba nyari summer school taun depan. ga tau kenapa tiba-tiba pengen aja ikutan, apalagi tempatnya di Belanda. setelah nyari di website, eh ketemu tentang Utrecht Summer School. kalau diliat dari courses yang mereka sediain, emang bagus dan sesuai sama program studi gw. sempet bingung juga mau ambil course apa dan akhirnya gw memutuskan untuk ngambil Clinical Research Monitoring. keliatannya bakalan asik banget summer school disana! mereka buka pendaftaran mulai tanggal 15 November besok and i really can't wait for it! my dad is already give his permission! yippie-kay-yay! :D

Would you rather vacation at the beach or in the mountains?

2010-11-07T21:48:00.003+07:00

beach would be awesome. watching sunset together with ur lover. too sweet :)

Ask me anything

How many languages do you speak?

2010-11-05T11:18:00.001+07:00

5. my mother language, english, french, korean, japanese (lil bit) and teach me dutch, kay! ;p

Ask me anything

Dutch Ladies :)

2010-10-14T00:38:00.005+07:00

2 weeks ago, me and my besties went to Paris Van Java and there's a Dutch photobooth. at first, i kinda hesitated to take picture with those Dutch costumes, but the girls pushed me to go with it, so drag them along with me to wear those lovely costumes. and voila! the pictures turned kinda funny (because i see myself looked so awkward with Dutch costumes) but we're all looked gorgeous, girls! :D

quite things that no one ever knows -part 1-

2010-10-13T21:35:00.005+07:00

it started about 2 months ago. so finally i met this guy. the man of my dreams.
after 1,5 years i can't believe that i had that chance to actually see him in person and hang out with him. it was like a big dream come true.
2 weeks before his departure, he told me he wanna go to Berlin. and this summer, he didn't manage the time to spend his summer holiday in Indonesia. i feel sad because i thought if this summer he's in Indonesia, then at least, i can met him.
then on August 2th (yes, i still remember the date) that's when the story begin..

i accidentally found out his friend's post on his Facebook, it said that he'll go to Indonesia that week.. and i was like "WHAT THE HELL?!" i was soooooo shocked. and happy of course :D maybe this would be the time i'll meet him!
so i chatted him on YM! next day and we talked like usual. i thought he would mention his homecoming, but it fact, he didn't. i really didn't know what's on his mind, is he trying to give surprise? maybe yes. maybe no.

and so he arrived on August 6th. that night, my brother and I went to his kebab store and my brother was asking where's his brother going (because his brother and my brother were going to same junior high school, they're both close to each other) and the store girl said the family was going to the airport to pick him up.

that's night, i can't sleep. just can't believe that night our distance is just 5 minutes away.
two days ago we're like 1000 miles away and 5 hours difference.

that night, we're on the same ground.
we breath the same air.
we're only 5 minutes away.
and it's too good to be true.

(to be continued)

hari ga produktif

2010-06-26T14:20:00.003+07:00

abis semaleman begadang belajar sampe jam 3 pagi, gw udah pasang alarm buat bangun jam 8. lumayan lah tidur 5 jam. hehehehe.. dan bener deh, jam 8 gw bangun. bukan karena alarm. tapi gara-gara "kehebohan" cafe sebelah.
bener-bener pusing gw. belajar ga bisa, tidur juga ga bisa. sumpah ya mereka nyanyi kayak orang keselek duren. i really don't know what exactly what they are singing about.
cuma teriak-teriak ga jelas dengan gebukan drum yang juga ga jelas temponya.
oh God. i should have been escape to another place. tapi males juga jalan-jalan. cuaca mendung gini enakan tidur deh.. bener-bener hari ga produktif. damn it!
berharap aj deh tuh cafe sebelah bakalan cepet selesai. at least, sore udah beres gitu. BIAR GW BISA BELAJAR DONG YAAH! *stress*

siklus hidup baru.

2010-06-24T18:25:00.002+07:00

entah kenapa udah beberapa hari ini berasanya malesss terus.
pulang dari kampus, tidur. dan tidurnya bener-bener keterlaluan. dari jam 4 sore bisa tancep sampe jam 9 malem. daaan.. malemnya udah ga bisa tidur lagi.
sampe jam 4 baru tidur lagi dan bangun telat. sampe ga ikut kuliah pagi. parah lah.
keknya emang harus berhenti jadi "kelelawar betina" kalo enggak pengen jadi "mata panda" *sigh*

it's been a while

2010-06-22T20:09:00.006+07:00

tiba-tiba mood lagi buat nulis blog abis liat blog orang lain tanpa sengaja. hahahahha..
dan gw coba liat2 lagi post2 gw udah lama dan berasa "geuleuh" sendiri. i actually wrote that? hahahahhaha.. sumpah ya, postingan gw ada yg ga banget. dan alay abis. oh my God, bener-bener memalukan.
dan akhirnya gw melakukan "pembersihan" posting2 ga jelas supaya blog gw kelihatan lebih layak dibaca. wakakkakaa~

ga kerasa bgt udah hampir mau setahun di bandung dan 2 semester menempuh pelajaran kedokteran. dan banyak banget hal yang terjadi, baik yang baik dan buruknya.
there's a lot of ups and downs in the middle of my learning process. dari yg harus ngulang blok 5 dan gagal komponen blok 6 which is bener-bener it's my lowest point of life. dan waktu ngasi tau kabar ke nyokap, beliau cm bilang, "ya gak papa.. yang penting kan udah berusaha."
and i cried. rasanya sedih banget harus ngecewain nyokap dan bokap yang udah bayar mahal banget buat sekolah gw. dan it seems like i wasted it.

dan sekarang gw janji sama diri gw sendiri, harus jadi lebih baik di blok-blok mendatang. dan selalu berikan yang terbaik, dan gak akan menyerah :)

02-11-09

2009-11-07T17:22:00.001+07:00

He looked so handsome yesterday. The first time I saw him, I was stunned. He’s like the most amazing creature that God ever made. With his grey-stripped shirt and white trousers, and also his white new shoes, he looked so gorgeous! I know I might sounds so exaggerated about this, but I write what I’m feeling.

I REALLY want to take pictures with him, but I know I just can’t do that. There’s something inside me telling me not to do it. I’m afraid that he didn’t want to do that, I’m afraid that he would know what I feel about him, I’m afraid that I’m not beautiful enough compared than him.

It hurts me a lot just writing this. Tears run down my face…

Last night, he stayed at my home. Yeah, I’m so happy. He slept in the living room though with my brother. And we spent sometime to talk while he was surfing the Internet. We also had a conversation & video call with Lia. It’s fun :) I showed him my childhood pictures. He smiled. I died.

I saw him sleeping, at that time I just want to hug him. I know it might sound weird, but his back is really tempting me. His broad shoulder was like calling me to hug him…

In the morning, he’s already woke up. I told him to take a shower first. I just loved to see his face in the morning. He’s like a little kid.

And today, I had to drop him at the airport. It hurts, but I guess I had no other option right?

On the way, I saw him sleeping again. He could sleep easily when there are AC, soft chairs, and his iPod touch. He’s sleeping in the whole trip. We arrived at the terminal and I know I had to say goodbye this soon. I hugged Michelle, and kissed her cheek then I told her goodbye and also to be careful.

He’s just standing there, even barely looked at me. I was about to cry leaving him like this. He just say goodbye with no expression. Seeing his back from a far, it’s like love leaving me.

A question suddenly popped on my mind. After all that I’ve done just only for you, this only what I’ve got? I texted him also, and he didn’t reply. How pathetic I am.

I’m giving all that I have, but he seemed don’t care about it. I know I cannot ask for more. I know he loves somebody else, and it’s not me.

what a dream come true.

2009-10-30T15:12:00.004+07:00

d
hahahahaa.. akhirnya kesampean jg punya macbook pro :) :)

panicked.

2009-10-30T15:08:00.002+07:00

anjrit banget sumpah gw kaget dong. hhaahaha.. tadi sempet panik gara2 mau eject cd dari macbook pro gw ga bisa. huaaaa.. gw udah mau nangis aj sumpah. hahahahaha..
and i posted a panicked-coz-i-cant-eject-dvd-from-my-mac status.. dan untunglah winda yang baik hati memberikan suatu ilham ke gw. ahhahahaha.. gosh, gw udah takut aja dvdnya ga isa keluar. hahaha..
tapi klo dipikir-pikir, gw kliatan katro jg tuh. ketauan bgt klo baru punya mac. ahhahahaha..

catherine karni lando

2009-10-17T13:02:00.001+07:00

catherine karni lando, originally uploaded by cathylando.

honey, i'm home! :)

2009-10-16T19:07:00.003+07:00

yay! i'm finally home at last. yes, i'll spend my weekend at home sweet home. hehehee..
walopun sbenernya ga tega ninggalin anak2ku di gratia bandung (hahahaha) tapi yah mggu ini tgl 18 pas 2 tahun kakek meninggal. ga kerasa ya..
*grandpa, i miss youuuuu~* coba kalo kakek masih ada ya, gw yakin beliau pasti bangga, well gw berhasil jg masuk jadi mahasiswa kedokteran.
i know u're lookin at me from up there :D

haaaah! gw udah ga sabar pgn hari mggu! AKHIRNYA GW BAKAL DAPET MACBOOK! wuakakakkakakakakkakak~ ryan, tunggu saja pembalasankuu :D :D

i hate it when i fall in love.

2009-10-15T14:04:00.002+07:00

I hate to surprised to see your SMS popping in my inbox and I hate what I have to take so long to respond, delete them, thinking it word for word.

I hate when i fell in love, all the details that I say, tell, send, write to you becomes important, as if to without disabilities, or I could be losing you. I hate to be in a position like that.

But, I can not bargain, eh?

i'm back

2009-10-15T13:27:00.002+07:00

HEY HEY HEY HEY!

wah, ga kerasa ya it's been 2 months since my last post. omagaid.

ni blog gw amat sangat terbengkalai. hehehehhe..

so yeah, here i am in Bandung. udah 2 bulanan di sini. kost gw pewe bgt. nyaman, dan senengnya ketemu orang2 baru yang asik2. ehhehe.. saking udah keenakan di kost, gw malah jadi jarang pulang. padahal sebelumnya udah bilang bakal tiap minggu pulang. ahhahaha..

pelajarannya masih belum terlalu susah sih. belum masuk ke ilmu kedokterannya.

masih ttg humaniora, komunikasi, berpikir kritis, bla bla blaaa.. ahhahahhaa.. mungkin keliatannya remeh bgt, tpi sebenarnya penting bgt. klo jadi dokter ga bs komunikasi bisa2 ga ada pasien yg datang. ahahahhaha..

ospeknya LUMAYAN parah. ahhahahaha.. gw ma tmn2 gw dikerjain smpe nangis. hah! padahal gw udah bkin mindset ga bakalan nangis, eh taunya mereka (para kakak senior & panitia) emang handal bgt deh. sukses bkin angkatan 09 menangis. whoooaah..

itu pengalaman yang ga terlupakan jg sih. seru jg ikut TORCH. ga nyesel deh.. mgkn emg gw pertamanya rada kesel2 gtu but akhirnya malah jadi suka ma acara itu. wakakkakakkaka~

bandung sekarang lagi musim ujan, jadi siangnya panas, sorenya hujan deres. heeh. beyceeekk.. :D

dan klo udah sore2 ujan, gw jadi males fitness. beuh, padahal udah bayar member gw bru fitness skali. wasting money nih. ahhhahaha.. seharusnya smangat bwt fitness AGAR PERUT RATA, CATH! hahahahhaa..

ni udah mendung lagi, gw jadi ngantuk. heee.

ato ntn dvd ya? tidur? makan?

from above

2009-10-15T13:19:00.002+07:00

from above, originally uploaded by cathylando.

they are my new friends. lucky to have em :) :) :)

besties <3

2009-10-14T23:24:00.002+07:00

besties , originally uploaded by cathylando.

my new bff -- michelle angelina. i love her :D

long time no see!

2009-10-14T23:17:00.002+07:00

waaaaaaaaaaaaah! geloo pisan. udah lama ga nge-blog. wakakkakaa..
so yeah, it's been 2 months gw udah pindah ke bandung dan menjalani college life gw yang totally new. hahahahhaa.. i meet a lot of amazing persons here :)

sbnrnya mw crita banyak. tpi udah kburu ngantuk.

his silly expressions.

2009-10-14T23:14:00.002+07:00

his silly expressions., originally uploaded by cathylando.

ahahahahhaa.. i just cant stop laughing when i look at this pic.
this guy is a total dork :D

sitting here, counting the hours..

2009-07-04T23:04:00.000+07:00

Duh. Gw skrg lg di rumah sakit. jagain nykp gw yg abs operasi usus buntu. Thank God, smua bjalan lancar & mom is fine :)
Gw bgg deh mw tdr dmn.. d kursi ato gelar karpet ya? *pikir2* Aaah, bgg dah.. Mgkn di kursi aj lah, praktis aj gtu. Hahahaa..

Ahh, I'm so sleepy right now. Need to sleep.. *i miss my laptop back @ home*

Back at one. My first love.

2009-07-04T23:02:00.001+07:00

maksud dr title diatas adalah, gw kembali menyukai idola yg sudah slma 3 taun gw gilai & cintai (krn UN kmrn gw jdi 'smpet' lupa sm mereka) Thanks to Idoth bff, yg sudah membrainwashed gw dgn superjunior, now I'm their biggest (crazy) fan again.. Hahahahaa.. Parahnya, dulu gw cinta bgt ma Kangin, and then skrg gw berpindah ke lain hati.. Yg bner2 ga gw nyangka jg, pdhl dulu gw plg ga suka ma tu org. ini mgkn yg namanya karma. Haduh

Yes. I admitted that Lee Hyukjae has took my heart away. God, i just love everything about him. From head to toe. any simple things & funny acts that he did, mesmerized me. I just feel that he's my gift from God. U may think this is a corny/crappy talk, but yeah.. I just simply love him.

Aneh skali knp gw bs suka hyukjae. Mgkn karna gummy smilenya? Atau dance moves yg keren yg dy bawain? Atau karena tmpg gantengnya? his funny personality? He's a kind & humble person? SEMUANYA GW SUKA. GW CINTA SUPER JUNIOR LEE HYUKJAE! <3

Gw jg seneng bgt suju udah comeback dgn album ke3 mrk yg menurut gw KEREN bgt. Sumpah, transformasi mrk ga tanggung2. Dari boys to men. Awesome! Gw tmbh cinta aj tuh sm 13 lelaki ganteng. Hhahahahaa..

Thank God, i finally got my life back :D

The untold story..

2009-07-04T22:50:00.001+07:00

So.. gw msti crita ap setelah hmpir 2 bln hiatus dr dunia blog? Hmm...
Yah, 1st of all, I'M OFFICIALY GRADUATED! Thank God, akhirnya pnderitaan masa SMA berakhir jg. It's kinda sad & amazing. Yg bkin sedih, karena gw hrs pisah sm tmn2 high school gw, esp bff gw, Idoth.. Aiih, sedih bgt ngbayangin qta semua separated & gotta go their own way from now on :( tpi di sisi lain gw seneng karna gw bakal ktemu tmen baru & msk ke lingkungan yg baru which is finally I'll get a new life. LOL

Wlopun emg nilai UN gw ga tinggi spti tmen2 gw yg lain (Aplg math gw yg bs dibilang nge-pas bgt. Anjrit! 4! Hahahhaa) yah tpi gw SGT bersyukur sm Tuhan gw, Tuhan Yesus, bwt 18 thn hidup gw. Man, these 18 years are sucha big blessings for me :) gw jalanin hidup skrg yah sbg gw yg baru, hrs lebih mandiri & tanggung jawab krn udah msk kuliah (dgn jurusan yg menuntut bnyk perhatian, otak, waktu, keberanian, blablablaa) jadi mau ga mau skrg harus berubah jdi org yg lebih baik. Karena bnyok jg udah susah cari duit bwt sekolah gw, gw harus bisa jadi dokter yg handal & bisa nolongin org. AMIIIIN~ :)

I'm BACK!

2009-07-04T22:32:00.000+07:00

Gilaaaaaa! Udah hampir 2 bulan gw ga isi blog gw. Oh my. I'm sorry dear blog, i neglected you away :( jeongmal mianhaeyo.. Ya ampun, bnyk bgt yg gw alamin tpi sll ada alasan ga bs nulis blog. Ckckck.. Gosh, I MISS MY BLOG SO MUCH! *continue to the next post*

totally crazy!

2009-05-07T18:35:00.003+07:00

serius deh. kali ini gw akuin bener2 gila sm artis. ahahhahaaa..
KIM SANG BUM. totally took my heart away. that guy.
killed me. with his killer smile. bang bang! i'm dead.
gw skrang ud bnr2 gila, ato mungkin bs dibilang freak abt him.
waktu ntn BOF tadi, gw nangis kyk org gila wktu ntn scene dy nangis.
how come? kyknya am suju aja ga bgtu gila. OMG.
i'm crazy. totally~
who can resist that cute smile?
*dies* *nosebleed*

capek bgt euyy!

2009-05-06T17:45:00.003+07:00

thank you God, finally UAS sudah selesai. syukurlaah.
i'm afraid of the result but yeah, just surrender to God. i believe i'm gonna pass this tests!
still, A hasn't reply my mssg. hiks.
i think he still busy with his own holiday to Belgie with his friends! how lucky he is!
aarrggh. i wish i could had a chance to study in Holland like him. :D
i'm so tired rite now. and i think i'm gonna watch BOF tonite.
coz i dont have to go to school tomorrow. yay! i'm gonna go to Bandung instead.
oh, life is soo great!

mau gila!

2009-05-04T16:48:00.002+07:00

aiih, serius deh. puyeng bgt hari ni.
gimana ga? td abis uas agama & ppkn. pas agamany sih lumayan lah.
masih bisa tidur gw. satu jam aj gw udah selesai. jago pisan!
lumayan sih soalny hmpir sm ky yg dikerjain wktu pra UAS. thank you, God!

nah, pas ppkn! anjroot. syusaaah bgt boo! soalny out of prediction!
essaynya gw isi 4 out of 5 questions. wew.
lupa bgt yg soal ttg Almond & Verba. walah. parah2.
gw jg gamau masuk fisip gtu. i'm so damn confused & tired!

mana bsok sejarah! SEJARAH, MAN! pelajaran ips yg paling gw gabisa!
and also ama TIK bsk. gilaaa. i'm soo dead deh tomorrow.
dunno wad to do. kyknya emg malem ni harus belajar.
arrrgh, malesss :(

and i dunno why kenapa pas pelajaran sejarah tb2 gw jdi lemes & murung gtu.
serius deh, gtw kenapa. something came into my mind which is very weird.
kenapa yaa? i just wanna cry. and trus pas pulang gw bengong aj gtu ky org aneh.
wad a weird me @_@;

i just want him to be happy :)

2009-05-04T16:41:00.003+07:00

God, i just want him to be happy always.
If she is the one who can make him smile, let both of them to be together..
He's my bff and i want him to be happy.. always.
I'd do everything, whatever it takes to make him smile :)

my prayer

2009-04-30T22:53:00.004+07:00

God, please open his heart..
so he would realize how much he means to me.

God, please open his eyes..
so he would see my feelings for him.

God, please open his ears..
so he would hear my heart now beats for him.

Just let him know how much i love him.
That's he's now in each breath that i take,
every steps that i take,
24/7 in my mind,
and also he already got a special place in my heart.

:)

2009-04-27T17:16:00.002+07:00

ok. i'm so happy rite now. yupp, u can guess why i'm happy and the only reason why is because A is already replied my mssg. so, now i decided to called him A, kinda nickname for him ;)
i thought that he wouldn't reply again.. but today, i just opened my fb and.. taraaaa! here come his mssg. it was short and to the point.
i'm kinda confused about what he's asking about. he asked that where i'm gonna go after UN. is it about where i'm gonna continue my study or about what i'm gonna do after UN? ahahhaaa..
maybe the 1st one is more senseable. :)
the point is i'm happy, but confused too! i was going to let him go.

what a dream come tru!

2009-04-26T10:36:00.006+07:00

oh yeaahh! akhirnya dapet laptop baru deh.. senangnyaa. tak terkira loh! :)
finally i got my own laptop which is ver cool, i love it! and yg bkin senangnya lgi, photoboothnya lebih keren daripada mac. seriously, i'm not kidding.. ahahaha.. photoboothnya mac kalah jauh deh. ahahhaa.. dari isinya juga mantep bgt. udah pake windows vista home premium! PREMIUM. ahahahaa. sumpah, ni laptop keren bgt. mskipun gede & agak berat, overall keren deh. gorgeous. i'm speechless :)
thanks, dad! and also thank you, GOD! :D

long time no see :)

2009-04-25T07:25:00.001+07:00

Wah, ud lama bgt ga ngisi blog gw. Hahaha. Maklum, ud 2 mggu gw ga pgang laptop. Ni jg online d hp ga puas, susah bwt ngetikny. Dasar viewty siaul. Kirain bli hp touch screen bkal enak makeny. Beuh, taunyaa..
just so u know, akhrny un gw ud slesai. 5 hr pjuangan akhrny berakhir :) tggal deg2an nunggu hasil d. Huuah. I wanna tell u some stories, but later on mybe. Ribet pke hp. Ga nyaman critany :))

HAPPY EASTER GUYS!

2009-04-13T00:17:00.002+07:00

HE'S RISEN! YAY! our Lord Jesus Christ has risen today, so happy easter, peeps! :))
wah, ga kerasa udah paskah.. ckckckk..
and ga kerasa juga UN TINGGAL SEMINGGU LAGII!
anjriit. parah parah parah..
dan yg lebih bodohnya, gw masih nyantai2.. gilaaaa emang nihh.
kacaau! mau jadi apa coba gw? hahahaa..
tinggal seminggu gw udah pusing abis. dunno what to do..
persiapan UN berasa blm mantep, tapi udah males blajar..
gawat gawat.. emang udah gila gw!

speaking of being crazy,
sekarang gw emang lagi gila bgt. :)
i'm soo happy (that maybe i'll be going nuts soon) coz my crush wrote a happy easter greeting on my wall. WOOOHHOOOOO~
ahh, so happy *tears*
sadly, dy emg belum bales mssg terakhir gw. mgkn emg lagi sibuk abis doii.
haaah. tak ap lah..
smangat ujian bwt yg d hollandaa! :))

and also for me! UN IS ONE WEEK AHEAD! wahahhaaaa..

Kepada Kamu dengan Penuh Kebencian

2009-04-11T10:05:00.004+07:00

Kepada kamu,
Dengan penuh kebencian.

Aku benci jatuh cinta. Aku benci merasa senang bertemu lagi dengan kamu, tersenyum malu-malu, dan menebak-nebak, selalu menebak-nebak. Aku benci deg-degan menunggu kamu online. Dan di saat kamu muncul, aku akan tiduran tengkurap, bantal di bawah dagu, lalu berpikir, tersenyum, dan berusaha mencari kalimat-kalimat lucu agar kamu, di seberang sana, bisa tertawa. Karena, kata orang, cara mudah membuat orang suka denganmu adalah dengan membuatnya tertawa. Mudah-mudahan itu benar.

Aku benci terkejut melihat SMS kamu nongol di inbox-ku dan aku benci kenapa aku harus memakan waktu begitu lama untuk membalasnya, menghapusnya, memikirkan kata demi kata. Aku benci ketika jatuh cinta, semua detail yang aku ucapkan, katakan, kirimkan, tuliskan ke kamu menjadi penting, seolah-olah harus tanpa cacat, atau aku bisa jadi kehilangan kamu. Aku benci harus berada dalam posisi seperti itu. Tapi, aku tidak bisa menawar, ya?

Aku benci harus menerjemahkan isyarat-isyarat kamu itu. Apakah pertanyaan kamu itu sekadar pancingan atau retorika atau pertanyaan biasa yang aku salah artikan dengan penuh percaya diri? Apakah kepalamu yang kamu senderkan di bahuku kemarin hanya gesture biasa, atau ada maksud lain, atau aku yang-sekali lagi-salah mengartikan dengan penuh percaya diri?

Aku benci harus memikirkan kamu sebelum tidur dan merasakan sesuatu yang bergerak dari dalam dada, menjalar ke sekujur tubuh, dan aku merasa pasrah, gelisah. Aku benci untuk berpikir aku bisa begini terus semalaman, tanpa harus tidur. Cukup begini saja.

Aku benci ketika kamu menempelkan kepalamu ke sisi kepalaku, saat kamu mencoba untuk melihat sesuatu di handycam yang sedang aku pegang. Oh, aku benci kenapa ketika kepala kita bersentuhan, aku tidak bernapas, aku merasa canggung, aku ingin berlari jauh. Aku benci aku harus sadar atas semua kecanggungan itu…, tapi tidak bisa melakukan apa-apa.

Aku benci ketika logika aku bersuara dan mengingatkan, “Hey! Ini hanya ketertarikan fisik semata, pada akhirnya kamu akan tahu, kalian berdua tidak punya anything in common,” harus dimentahkan oleh hati yang berkata, “Jangan hiraukan logikamu.”

Aku benci harus mencari-cari kesalahan kecil yang ada di dalam diri kamu. Kesalahan yang secara desperate aku cari dengan paksa karena aku benci untuk tahu bahwa kamu bisa saja sempurna, kamu bisa saja tanpa cela, dan aku, bisa saja benar-benar jatuh hati kepadamu.

Aku benci jatuh cinta, terutama kepada kamu. Demi Tuhan, aku benci jatuh cinta kepada kamu. Karena, di dalam perasaan menggebu-gebu ini; di balik semua rasa kangen, takut, canggung, yang bergumul di dalam dan meletup pelan-pelan…

aku takut sendirian.

seriously, i really love this note. Made by Raditya Dika. pas bacanya tuh gw ngerasa 'gilaa, nih pas bgt sm apa yang gw rasain. oh my. Raditya TOP ABISS!

klo pada mau baca di sitenya Radith, buka aj http://radityadika.com :)

my mangatar! it's fun!

2009-04-04T15:56:00.005+07:00

that's my mangatar.. i just made it. is it looks like me? :D
felice dear give an awesome web for making your own avatar.
http://www.faceyourmanga.com
it's a very cool website! really!
oh ya, i make another one too..

mirip siapa cobaa? ahahhahaa..

pasrah deh gw

2009-04-04T00:05:00.003+07:00

yaahh. apa mau dikata.
bagai punguk merindukan bulan.
dengan berat hati saya mengumuman bahwa saya gagal masuk UI. ahahaha.
apa mau dikata. nasi suda jadi bubur. yasudalah.. relakan saja..
saya masih tidak tau bagaimana nasib tman2 saya di luar sana.
mudah2an saja mereka berhasil. ahhahaa.. :D
cheers!

OH. MY. GOD

2009-04-03T23:55:00.001+07:00

in 5 minutes. gw bakal tau keterima ato kaga d UI.
oh my goosh. tangan keringetan. ni udah gemetaran bgt ngetik d keyboard.
swt. anjritt.
mampuss gw. HAHAHAHA..

april mop! ahahaa..

2009-04-01T20:41:00.002+07:00

serius deh. april mop taun ini boring abiss. ahahaa..
not funny at all. yg ngerjain cm guru kimia kesayangan, c mr.nahat (yang kayaknya kurang kerjaan juga waktu itu) ahahhaa...
so, abis to kimia tadi, gw and the girls as usual pergi ke 'basecamp' (baca: perpustakan untuk online facebook dll). then datanglah si kecil aka bian.
nemplok, and endep up ngliatin gw and idoth online.
tadinya gw udah mw ngerjain tuh anak, tpi ksian deh. ga tega ngliad mukany and matanya yg ud puppy eyes gtu. ahahaha..
eh, lagi ol enak2, tiba2 dateng deh tuh c pa nahat.

pa nahat: (buka pintu perpus) eh, udah masuk itu. ayo cepet!
gw dll: idih! apaan sih, sir? msh 15 menit lagi tau.
pa nahat: kls ipa kan? udah masuk. mau bahas soal to yg tadi (smbil mesem2 ga jelas!)
gw: mister ngaco bgt deh. bohong kan? alaah, gayaa (gw mash sok2 online gtu)
pa nahat: serius ini. ayo cepet. gurunya udah di kelas

akhirnya gw ma yg lain keluar deh.
dalam hati gw dongkol bgt deh ma tu guru satu. ganggu quality time gw.
ahhahaa.. :D
trs pas masuk koridor, pa nahat d belakang gw.
langsung gw datengin, plototin!

gw: (menatap penuh kemarahan)
pa nahat: (masih mesem2 ga jelas) eh, bagus tuh! (sambil nunjuk bando gw)
gw: (dengan narsisnya) iya lahh, bagus emg, saya tau, pak
pa nahat: (dgn tmpg ga bdosa) iy, biar bian tambah suka
gw: (ngakak kaya org tolol) WAKAKKAKAKAKA.. (lari menghampiri idoth)

seriously, my chem teacher is INSANE! bisanya2 dy nyangka gw suka ma bestfriend gw sndiri. ahahahha. duduyy. kinda funny, ya biarlah orang2 dengan opini mereka.
i told that to the girls and they were just like crazy. aneh2 deh tu guru gw.
well, at least this april mop not wasted away.
walopun ga lucu, aneh juga gpp deh. :)

here we go again

2009-03-31T21:25:00.003+07:00

i skipped school today. and it feels awesome cause i dont have to meet bandot today!
yay! soo awesome! sadly, i got him for tomorrow. shoot.
chem & b.indo TO for tomorrow. hiks. i'm so lazy to study rite now
and i'm feeling like lazy to write on my blog.
maybe bcause i got twtter now, that's bad. ahhahaaa.

i saw A online again. and he doesnt reply my mssg.
aarrgghh. why why why? :(
is it too hard just to say hello?

online!

2009-03-30T00:48:00.004+07:00

yuup! si A lg online tuh.
pasti bales2in komen dari girlfriendsnya.
and then ga bls mssg gw. great, huh?
masa bales mssg doank bs mpe lama bgt? pdhl gw ngmgnya dikit.
bah. apa macam? malaayyy jadinya..
and u better come with good reply.
(cross fingers) 4 months to goo! AWW!

my soon-to-be laptop!

2009-03-28T18:31:00.003+07:00

my soon-to-be laptopp! aahahhaa. i love it so much.
i think i have to let macbook go. cause it's soo xpensive rite now.
huuuh.. well, maybe someday i could buy it by my own money.
amenn! :)

lalalala..

2009-03-28T08:53:00.002+07:00

wew. ud brp lama ga post? i'm quite busy twittering these days. hahaha. hmpir sj melupakan blog gw. but, well. twitter is fun, dbnding facebook skrg yg rame and ga jelas jdny. hehe..
rbu kmrn gw ma nykp jalan k bdg, antering tante ana balik k cimahi. cpe but fun. pgn blik k rmh eyang lg. hehe..
mggu ini tu bnr2 mggu yg mnydihkn. bygkn betapa desperate & sdìny gw wkt si A blm bls mssg. kesel jg, scr wall cwe laen dbls lah koq gw kga. keki abs, bos! hahaha.
tpi syukurlah dy ud bls skrg. dmaafin ga y? tw ah. gelaaap.

raport bayangan & student led confrence.

2009-03-25T09:33:00.002+07:00

well, akhirnya selesai jg hari ini. students led confrence berjalan dengan lancar. bagus jg sih, gw presentasiinya lancar & i hope my mum will be impressed.
rapot bygn? HAHAHA. jangan tanya. masih berbayang2. wakkakaaa..
so far sih semua nilai bagus, cm masih ad yg 'nyangkut' which is math & chem.
penyakit lama. ahahaha.
enak deh, abs ni mw ke bandung! asiik! :)

so tired..

2009-03-21T20:28:00.002+07:00

alamak! cape kali hr ni. hahaha. najis bgt logat gw ky c bandot. wkkaa. balik dr bogor, lsg k ambassador kuningan. jalan2. smpet beli anting ma gelang jg sih. what a temptation, ad sepatu bgus. grrr.. ada kali 5 jam muter2. wew.
krn ud cape, akhrny mkn di AW. gw pesen rootbeer, ayam, french fries, aandd.. waffle!

hahaha. bujud. perut ap gentong ya? bs muat mknn sbgtu bnykny (:
setelah makannn.. TARRAA! look @ my empty plates!

td smpet mampir jg k retail apple, liad macbook! KEREN BGT! aduh aduh. pgn bgt euy. apa daya, hargany 13 jt, boo. gw kira 10an. malah naik tnyta. siaul.. td ad hp yg keren jg c. sktr 10jt. nykp sih nyaranin bli hp aj. tpi ap mw dkata, hati gw ud kpincut macbook. hahaha.

menunggu.. menunggu..

2009-03-21T11:06:00.001+07:00

aduh, bete abs gw dsini. ud 2 jam nungguin dktr tpi blm2 abs pasienny. bejibun bgt ky pasar. waduh. nykp blg msh 1 org lg sblm giliran qta. oh my.. mana ngantuk pula. pgn cpt2 slesai trus shopping. (:
sambil nunggu akhirnya gw fto2 deh. ad fountain bgus d situ. and ada teratainya.
gw kirain asli, tauunya... plastik! ahahhaa.

i was born to say i love you.

2009-03-21T06:45:00.002+07:00

morning! hahaha. it's saturday and i woke up early. magic. (:
nykp tb2 bgunin and minta dtemenin k bogor. well, i guess i have to say yes. pdhl tdny mau maen komp sharian. ysuwlah, let it go.

A still hasn't replied my mssg. i suddenly woke up at 4.30 ('rumah Tuhan' ud brkoar2 sih) and go online. dissapointed waves hit trough me. dy blm bls. )':
i wish i could say this soon, "i was born to say i love you, ***.." cause this feeling is real.

pathetic!

2009-03-20T22:30:00.001+07:00

i'm considering myself as a pathetict girl. ironic, but there's the truth..
so, i was like checking my fb for abt each ten minutes. i'm wondering if A is already replied my mssg. pathetic? yes. miserable? of course. gosh, it's really torturing me. this whole waiting-for-reply thing is like forever.
i think i'm born to be always waiting *sigh*.

gloomy..

2009-03-20T21:53:00.004+07:00

tdi pgi A udah bls mssg gw. but don't know why his mssg seemed different to me. i got an impression that he doesn't want to reply it actually. i don't know for sure, but that's what i think. or maybe he's busy (as always)? probably. bcos he replied it after 3 days. gw jd ga enak. ap dy ngrasa kganggu ato mgkn ga suka gw mssg dy trus? pls don't.
yah, mudah2an his next mssg would be better. klo ga, ... i think i'd rather stop all this craziness. maybe he's not for me.
td pas gw ol lwt ebuddy, i saw him online. gtw d kpn dy bls lg, mgkn skrg, bsk, lusa, ato ga sm sx. hahaha. i'm really a pessimistic girl, don't i? :)
he mentioned that he'll be back on July, but he didn't tell me the date. why? bcos i'm not his friend? kykny sih.
i'm a perfect stranger.

kayakny gw hrs nyiapin diri bwt anything that could happen, better or worse.

i'm pissed & they're just bunch of jerks covered with shit.

2009-03-20T21:44:00.002+07:00

wew, hr ini gw bete bgt euy. pissed by some friends who acted annoying. ga ad stu org pun yg ngsi tw gw klo msti bkin cover portfolio! what a jerk. brengsek bgt smua. emang dasar hypocrites and big fat liar! di dpn bae, tpi nusuk dr blkg. sialan.
gw pgn cepet2 lulus and move out from that living hell. gw udah ga tahan liad wajah2 sok manis & innocent pdhl dalemny busuk. ga lebih dari sampah. they're all like a piece of shit.

yay! 2nd TOs is finally over!

2009-03-18T11:53:00.005+07:00

YAY! thanks GOD! semua sudah selesai. ahahhaa. :D

tadi sumpah bionya syusaaah bgt! soal macam ap tuh? siaul. mana gambar2nya pada ilang gtu. wah, kacau deh pokoknya. qta mulai ulangan jam 8 which is telat 30 menit dari jadwal yang seharusnya.
mesti nunggu lama juga gara2 ternyata soalnya baru difotokopi! great! manteep deh. tapi sih gw berharap mudah2an dapet bgt deh. pliss, God. at least nilainya lebih tinggi drpd TO sblmnya. :)
so far, nilai To kedua yang baru gw tau cm bahasa indo. itupun dapet 6,2. hahahaha.
timpang bgt sama hasil TO yang sebelumnya. wew. gmn math, fisika, & kimia ya?
i don't wanna think about it! takut mampuss. ahahahaha =D

still, A blm bales mssg gw. haaah. it's really depressing!
pdhl smlm dy ol, bukannya bales mssg gw kek. hahaha.
i just hope tonight i'll get his mssg! (crossed fingers)

i named it LOVE

2009-03-18T04:38:00.004+07:00

your name
written all over my face
sounded in every heart beat i take

even if we're a thousand miles away
two different continents
two deep & large oceans

you came into my life
like a sudden rain drops
pouring down into my burning heart
that it flames has burned so long

vanishing all the worries,
sadness,

and pain.

it's 4 o'clock in the morning..

2009-03-18T04:02:00.004+07:00

well, as my post title said. i really eager to know what is aditya's mssg reply but it endep up sad. he hasn't reply it (bayangin aja gw terbangun jam stenga 4 PAGI cuma bwt online ngecek inbox fb gw..) which is tumben bgt, biasa jg cepet yakk. hiiih. bete. i saw on facebook that he's online right now, and i'm such a coward cause i didn't even dare to chat with him. ahahaha. i just wanna say to him right away like HEY, REPLY MY MSSG, DUDE! ahahaha. but it's I-M-P-O-S-S-I-B-L-E! mana berani gw. hahahaa. but yeah, maybe i just could wait till he reply. don't think i can wait..

ah ya...
akhirny battle of TO war is over.
kimia udah, fis udah, and the last one is math. mathnya susah bgt, and i'm sure i don't pass. :(( again. and again.. hahaha. mana tgl 25 tar bkal ambil rapot bayangan. mantep deh penderitaan gw. siap2 'disemprot' & 'dinyanyiin'. aahahahaa..

nah, now he's offline without replying my msg.
arrrgh. gilaa. gilaa.. mungkin dy lg sibuk kalii ya.
duh, dit. cepet bales napa.. jgn bkin org penasaran! :D

WEW! udah jam stnga 5! ahahhaha. ga kerasa yaak. hihi..
well, klo tidur lagi, tanggung juga. tar stenga 6 udah bgun lgi.
mending blajar bio lagi kali yee. hmm, ok ok! smangat2! =)

pasrah

2009-03-16T10:53:00.000+07:00

wew. akhirnya slesai jg TO fisika gw! ahahhaa. well, mnurut gw sih ga terlalu susah dibandingin sama TO yg sebelumnya yg soalnya dewa bgt! ahahaha. mudah2an aj lulus!
i just wanna 6,5, God! :D
besok battle terakhir deh. MATH! hahahha.

i'm speechless. my hands freezing. and i got adrenalin rush.

2009-03-15T00:32:00.009+07:00

OH.MY.GOD! i think today is gonna be one of my best day in my life.
what i think is impossible is finally come true!
i never think that this day would come soon.

YAY! A added me as his friend! YIPPIIE-KAYY-YAY!
i was so speechless and i just wanna scream when i saw his friend request. i know it's might be a simple thing for everyone else, but for me it's very important and it's a big big miracle for me. hahahhaha.. my God, i love u so MUCH! much much! that could maybe make my heart explode! ahahahha. :D

new guys in my life

2009-03-14T18:35:00.008+07:00

HAHA! since the American Idol season 2009 starts, i've been spotting one of cute guys among all of the contestants. ahahaha. and since the first show aired, i fell in love with Danny Gokey!

ahahaha. yepp, cute guy with glasses. That's is so my perfect guy of dream. hahahhaa. he's so gorgeous! and handsome. also, he's got personality. that's really important. he's a church music director. i think that's awesome. his voice is so husky like kanginie! ahahhaha. oh my! cowo idaman gw ga jauh2 dari tipe oppa. ahahhaa.

also, i began to like Justin Long.
i watched die hard 4.0 and suddenly fall for him. as usual, i'm easily fall for someone cute. ahahaaa. his acting is cool. and what the best i like from him is his damn sexy voice. gosh! i wish i could have man whose voice like him. when he talks, it's sounds soo.. ahh, i just couldn't describe it. ahhaha.. :)
but something is making me sad, he's already 30! wow. he supposed to be my uncle. but if one day, a guy like him proposed to me, i couldn't just say no. ahahaha.

new layout!

2009-03-14T14:12:00.004+07:00

i love my new layout. it's simple and clean.
thanks to http://btemplates.com for making such an awesome vintage layout for my blog.
ahahhahaa :D

oh y, A udah bales mssg gw. and oh my God.
he explained all the about the university thing clearly. and i was just like guilty.
i dont know why. but i feel that he's too kind to me.
infact, i'm a stranger. we dont know each other. but why he's soo kind?
it's kinda depressing cause i asked a lot of the holland university thing, but i already know in the end i won't go there. so sad & pathetic. :(

crazy timess.

2009-03-13T22:42:00.005+07:00

hari ini gw udah gila bgt. ahahhaa. saking udah stressnya abis TO kimia, akhirnya gw, dina, uthe & felice bfoto2 ria. tadinya c fto yg normal2 ajah. then a crazy idea popped in my head, and the girls and i agreed to had an sudden invasion to Bian's house! ahahhaa. kasian bgt bian, jadi sasaran para gadis2 kelaparan & keringetan. ahhahaa!! karena gw juga udah gtw mau ngapain, sesampainye di hum bian, gw langsung utak atik macbook dy. sorry, bee. tapi emg udah kebelet bgt pgn punya mac (tp blm kesampean) jadilah gw berfoto2 ria dengan macbooknya. pertama cuman gw doang yg sangat bersemangat bereksperimen dengan effect photo boothnya, then mereka b3 gabung dah! hahahhaa. bisa dibayangkan keadaan menjadi rusuh & chaos. paling kasian ya si bian pasrah ngeliatin macbooknya diutak atik ga keruan ma gw. ahhahaaa. :D

oh yaa. QUICK UPDATE.
A ternyata emg co yg baik bgt. gw ga nyangka dy bs ngasih info ttg skul d belanda dengan sedetail mungkin. what a nice guy. tpi kasian juga sih, gw udah ngabisin waktu dy bwt bales mssg gw yg ternyata cm kedok bwt deketin dy. hehehe. sorry, A. i dont have any other ways to approach u. :)
i just hope he would forgive me cause spending his precious time with my annoying questions. hehe..

senangg (lagi)

2009-03-11T13:37:00.004+07:00

HUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA... i'm so happy. A is already replied my msg. hoho. at first, i was so hopeless. cause i'm not expecting anymore that he would reply it.
but today, i'm so speechless and excited. finally, he replied it! ahahaha.
and he was just like so kind and nice. ahahahhaha.
GW SENENG BGT!!!

miserable.

2009-03-09T09:49:00.006+07:00

two days ago was idoth's bday party. icha & me successfully made her surprised & cried. hahahaaa. she really didn't expect it from us. but well, im so glad to make her happy :) and we also watch raditya dika's movie which is AWESOME! well, i personally like it & i think it's really funny & romantic. i don't know that Dika is a romantic guy like that. ehehee. :D we also spent our time with the karaoke thing. ahahaha. too hilarious!

still, A hasn't reply my msg. i don't know what had happened to him.
but i guess maybe he thought i'm an annoying girl that tried to grab his attention.
ironic & pathetic. i just keep thinking positive, that maybe he's too busy with his school stuff & got no time to reply my msg. i think it's impossible. :(

i'm miserable. devasted, again. :)

exhausted.

2009-03-06T19:25:00.000+07:00

Gila, today is the most exhausted day. Byngin aj, gw jalan dr dpn metmal smpe dpn tmpt bimbel. Wakakaka. Tired bgt! And yg lbh parah lg, dina lost her cellphone. Poor girl. We was on the planet surf's salee, and then she suddenly felt her empty pocket. Ckckck. Im so afraid. And also freake d out. Ini pljrn jg bwt gw spy lbh hati2 d. :)

SENANGG~

2009-03-04T20:14:00.001+07:00

gw senang! senang! senang! SENANNGGGGG!
A is already replied my mssg. ahahhahaa
but then i was just like confused.
what i'm gonna say to him? gaaah.

reply pleasee.

2009-03-02T20:58:00.001+07:00

oh my. he hasn't reply my msg. hiks.
jgn2 dy emg bner gmw bls lg. haduh.
mgkn dikirain gw cwe centil x yaa. oh my.
i'm soo stressed. God, pls help me!
:'(

:'(

:'(

it's over finally. YAY!

2009-03-01T21:31:00.001+07:00

waaah, akhrnya simak ui selesai jugaa! thanks GOD!
i'm speechless & relieved! hehehe.
:))

deg2an & pasrah

2009-03-01T00:28:00.001+07:00

oh my. simak ui tinggal menghitung jam.
oh my. oh my. oh my.
gw brasa ga siap bgt secara td jam 11 bru balik dr pameran komputer
parah. belum blajar ap2 nih. mampoeeeii! ahahahaa.
pusing bgt. pgn muntah. ngantuuk..
aduh. tar jam 4 msti bgun lg, tpi takut ga bs bgun bw blajar.
i'm stressed out! just hope all this madness over soon.
cross fingers! :D

(i should've post this yesterday. but, my internet connection is being gay.
sooo. yeah, i posted it today. ap mw dkata.. gpp lah, yg penting ud SIMAK UI UDAH LEWAT! hahaha)

my feelings for him.

2009-02-27T20:45:00.005+07:00

i browsed some lyrics that i like recently.
well, it adjusted to my mood.
because now i'm in a love mood, soo i like love songs.
hahahahaha. lame. :)

my first fave love song,
Christian Bautista's Since I Found You.
i could hear this song for hundreds time a day & never get bored.
when i hear this, i just smiled at myself and think about him.
him is not my 6 years-waited crush anymore fyi (cause he'd already replaced by A :)

"Since i found you my world seems so brand new
You've showed me the love i never knew
Your presence is what my whole life through
Since i found you my life begin so new
Now who needs a dream when there is you
For all of my dreams came true
since i found you.."

yupp, that's what exactly i feel when i found him :)

second is Melee's Built to Last.
i just copied it from my friend's laptop and i listen to it couple times,
and shocked. i liked it! it's a catchy song with beautiful lyrics.
enough to represent what i'm feeling right now.

"I've looked for love in stranger places
But never found someone like you
Someone whose smile
Makes me feel i've been holding back
And now there's nothing I can't do
Cause this is real, and this is good
It warms the inside just like it should
But most of all
Most of all, it's built to last
It's built to last"

OH! and part of the lyrics that i like the most,
"Cause you are the sun in my universe.."
:)

akhirnya TO selesai jugaa!

2009-02-27T20:40:00.001+07:00

i dedicated this post just to say..

YAY! TRY OUTS ARE FINALLY OVER! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYAYAYYY!
I'M HAPPY & I'M CRAZY. HAHAHAHAHAHA..

what's the best way to approach a guy?

2009-02-27T20:16:00.003+07:00

it's friday already! ahahhahaa. times flew soo fast.
simak ui is waiting in front of me.
GOD. i feel so not fully prepared for it, but well i'll try my best.

yesterday was A's bday. yupp.
he turned to 19? if i'm not mistaken. ahahaa.
i saw a lot of comments on his facebook.
all happy birthdays'.
i guess he's pretty famous and had lot of friends.
mostly girls. (sigh)
i'm a coward. totally coward.
so i used my brother's acc to put comment on his fb.
geez. how coward i am. COWARD! :(

i supposed to add hi yesterday, on his birthday.
but i'm got some distractions ( i had math&bio try outs) so i was like forgot to add him. besides, i also scared. why? cause i dunno what will i say to him, after he accept my friend req. i dont want him to feel or got impression that i'm an easy girl or something else like that. i saw some girls that tried to get to know him ended up with failure. i dont want that happen to me. so, i'll take my time time to figure out what's the best way to approach him. huff. cross fingers & start thinking!

OH! if u guys hv some ideas about how to approach a guy, just lemme know! :)

distractions.

2009-02-22T22:42:00.001+07:00

i was checking my fb, when i saw a HOTTEST pict ever of my 6 years waited crush! oh my, oh my. i tried my best to keep thinking how to breath, coz suddenly i felt that air around me was taken away. he's so hot!
back from my fantasy land, what was i'm thinking? i supposed to be forget abt him. i thought, i could. but now i guess i need xtra strength. hmm..
how can think abt my new guy, when there's a lot of distractions bugging me? haduuh. :(

i'm in love. i hope i could make this one the last.

2009-02-21T20:36:00.004+07:00

i don't know what happened to me for the last 3 days.
since i saw a guy's profile which is (i don't how to say it) my brother's friend's brother. hahaha.
i ever met him. maybe last year i guess.
at that moment, i didn't feel anything.
there's no single thoughts crossed my mind, that someday i would love him like crazy
he's kinda handsome with two dimples on his cheeks (which is makes him very cute. aahh.)
he was born in padang, on feb 26th (5 days more!)
i know exactly the year, coz he didn't put year on his facebook! :(
right now, he's studying in Netherlands, Eindhoven (i dunno if i spelled it right :)
well, it's all i know for now.

i'm looking forward his comeback to Indo.
there's a lot of nice pictures of him.
most of them was taken in another countries, like France & Vatican.
how lucky he is. since he study in Netherlands, he seemed could travel a lot to another countries.
i'm soo jealous. :)

at first i saw his fb, sudden weird feelings hit me.
i felt that what i've been looking for all of my entire life was found.
kinda cheesy, but it's true.
since that event, i couldn't hardly stop thinking about him.
oh.my.god.
what happened to me?
he's the only guy who makes me stop thinking from my 6 years-waited crush!
how that become possible? i've been trying to find a lot distractions to pushed that mind away.
and now, my 6 years-waited crush was on my recycle bin. amazing.
and it feels great. wonderful. it feels different to find another guy to think beside him.
but now, i did! 3 days ago, i was free from pain waiting for 6 years!

but, i hope i could make this one the last.
last forever. it might be look impossible.
he's in Netherlands, i'm in Indonesia.
hmm, but i believe if it's God's plan, everything could happen.
everything is possible.

i keep questioning my self, how deep is ur love?
is this just a temporary crazy feeling? or true love?
my true missing pieces? or just sudden lust?
but whatever it is, i'm sure that i'm in love with a guy named AH.
:)

busy days. as always.

2009-02-01T12:21:00.000+07:00

oh my god. hr ni gw bkal TO for abt 4 hours. What a joke, huh? i'm so sleepy, and rite now i hardly could what my bimbel teacher is teaching. sadly, i hvnt made any friends yet. i'm all alone. hiks. snin a tes lari. slasa ul math. rbu ul fisika. kmis ad ul sjrh & agama. life couldnt get better..

tiredd. =)

2009-01-29T17:59:00.003+07:00

today is a another bad day. guru bio gw kyknya lg 'dapet'. spjg 1 jam, beliau marah2 mulu. wew. i really dont wanna listen to her, instead i just sitting on my desk thinking about another things that might be more important than my bio teacher has said. ahahhaa. but im considering myself kinda lucky today. ad msg d facebook yg ngasi tau klo dika bgi2 tiket premier filmnya. waaaaaa. lsg cepet2 ol, and tadaaaa! look @ my header blog! hihi. fingers crossed now, hope that i'm one of 200 lucky persons! XD
gotta back to real life, cari lagu prancis bwt bsookk. oh man.

i'm crushing for grey's anatomy series!

2009-01-07T14:29:00.006+07:00

i seemed so addictive to this serial. wloun bru bbrp x ngikutin kykya keren bgt ngeliad dokter2 itu. hahahaa. critanya lmyn seru & quite attractive. hehee. =)
it's sooo cool how to see those doctors work. even it's acting they're soo convincing. hahahaaa. =) and i really love dr.Sloan. H-O-T! mwahahhaaaa.

happy bday, bhenk2! =)

2009-01-07T13:25:00.000+07:00

happy bday to IRENA! hehe. eventhou i i know that she wont found out this, but still i want to give my special bday greeting for her. coz she's my best buddy!
i wish all the best for her & all her dreams come true.
fight for ur life & love, bhenk! i love u. xxxooo

officially being a maranatha's student

2009-01-06T19:35:00.001+07:00

yeahh. i just came back from bandung. ngurusin bwt kuliah tar.
thx God, smw brjalan lancar.
and from now on i'm officially being a maranatha's student.
HORRAAAY! i'm not supposed to be that happy, but this is amazing.
saat plg emosional dlm hidup gw part.2!
td sempet ktemu c'tanti. i miss her.
and now i LOVE HER.
she's soo kind & nice. bruntung d ud ad tour guide d maranatha. hahahaa..
crita bnyk sm c'tanti, and gw akhirnya dpr gambaran ttg how university's life looked like. dy unjukin kostnya yg ternyata keren bgt. sugoiii! gw pgn ngekost dstw.
ahhh, i couldnt wait till my graduation.
ahahahaaaa. i'm soo tired..
i think i gonna sleep earlier but still have choir rehearsal.
PRAISE THE LORD! yeaahh.

random feelings.

2009-01-05T19:53:00.000+07:00

new year! yeahh. finally. wktu cepat sx berlalu. hahaaa..
i think this year is gonna be my best year! yap. be positive.
i havent write my new year resolutions though. hahaa..

last Saturday, i just met Robert.
God! it's been 1 year 3 weeks since our last meeting. hahaa.
ironis bgt. tpi yah knyataanny gtu.
cikarang-gading it's like a 1000 miless~ lebaay. hahaaa.
dy ga brubah. masih ky dlu.
same style. same hair, but lil bit longer.
a moustache. hahaha. grown up already. =D
i still saw that gorgeous brown eyes. Tuhaaaann! i wish his mine! XDD
tpi kyknya gilanya tetep aj. aneh jg sama aj.
dasarr. ditambah ahau yg tetep aneh+norak+narsis+nyebelin. hohohohooo.
but gw lyd dy skrg lbh mature. hihi =D
gw ga nyangka bs ktemu dy lg. stelah staun ga ktemu, tnyt Tuhan mendengar doaku.
hahhaa.. i really really miss him. =)
he was wearing a white shirt that day with dark blue jeans and pair of and1 shoes.
how gorgeous he is. at first, i'm soo damn speechless.
huaaah. my heart skips a beat the moment i saw him for the first time i entered his store. God, i wanted to captured all his images in my head FOREVER!!!!!

i arrived at his store about 2 o'clock. and he guided me upstairs to grab something to eat. after that we had a long chit chat & blah-blah-blah for 3 hours.
yeah. we talked about everything randomly. hahahaa.
at that time, i felt that my missing part was back. sounds cheesy, but that's the truth. while i'm writing this, my eyes got wet. i'm gonna say it out loud, I MISS HIM.

that precious 3 hours was really mean everything for me.
when i got home, i was hardly not to think abt him, but it's so impossible.
i just wish that someday, i'll be able to meet him again.
not just as a good friend, but as a woman that will show her feelings for him that she's been keeping for 6 years.

holidaaay! & welcome new hair.

2008-12-17T20:59:00.000+07:00

whooa. hr ni ud ambil raport. hehe.
yaah, as usual math-nya jelek! hahahaaa.
but what amazed me, kimia & fisika nya bagus. yeaah! seneng bgt.
biologi nya jg naik. well, i had progress! finally. =D
bkn berarti bangga, tpi msti tmbh smangat bljr lagi d.
fighting!!

abis blik ambil rapot, i'm heading to the mall.
yup! i need to fix my messy hair that started to annoyed me. XD
after 5 hours, TARAAAAAAA~
hello new straight-short-hair. ^^

Tuhan, terima kasih..

2008-12-15T22:23:00.001+07:00

Today is the best day of mylife. Akhrny gw dterima d FK maranatha. Oh my God. I couldnt imagine. Bnr2 unexpected. Wkt lyd d intrnt, gw lsg kci tw bnyok. Mrk sng bgt & sking sngny gw nangis! Saat itw bnr2 saat yg plg emosional dlm hdp gw. Hahaha. Rasany lega bgt. Dan akhrny mlm ni gw bs tdr dgn tenang dan mimpi indah.. Bwt tmen2 yg ud doain & support gw, esp. Idoth & Bal2, thank u so much. May God bless u all.
Tuhan, terima kasih untuk hadiah yg ga terlupakan d umurku yg k 18..

finally come back home.

2008-12-14T16:28:00.000+07:00

ohmy. i just came back from Bandung. i miss home soo much! XD
gilaa, td usm marnath rame bgt. org bejibun. mybe abt 500 people there.
and bnyk bgt yg mw msk kdktrn. kederr gw. hahahaaaa.
soalnya susahh! hiks.
parahnya, pengumumannya slasa sore. ancuur.
cepet bgt gila.. huaaaa. ='(
i'm sooo afraid. guys, please wish me luck & pray for mee! wkkkaa~
UN tggal 4 bulan lg. yeps! times flew so fast.
blajarrr. blajarr.. =D

happy bday to me!

2008-12-13T06:39:00.001+07:00

Yay! I‘m officially being 18. Hahaha. Pheew, ngrasa tua gw. Hehe.
well, d ultah gw skrg, mgkn ini yg plg bda. coz today gw bkal ikt usm maranatha. OH.MY.GOD. i'm litte bit afraid & nervous. the test will be held from 1 pm til 5 pm. weew. lamaa bgt. mdh2an aj tar bs ngjaenny. hehe.. my bday wish is i hope he remember my bday. Hopefully..

kangen..

2008-12-10T22:18:00.000+07:00

gtw napa.. gw ngrasa kangen bgt sm hdp gw yg dlu. aplg momen2 wkt kls 3 smp dlu. duh, masa2 indah yaak! hahaha.. yup, i miss the time that chey & i spent time together, sitting on a bench stared at those starry skies.. =')

hampir slesaaaiii!

2008-12-10T14:14:00.000+07:00

weeew. 2 days more to go! yayy.
anjroot. td fisika susaaah bgt. 35 PG + 5 ESSAY! huaaaa.
mana pake LJK pula.. pheew.
gila mampui. untung aj agama ga susah.
wel, not to bad lah. Upps! Td smpt DC. beuh. komp butut dasarr. hehehe. oh my. pusing bgt bljr chem. uuaah. ud ngantk pula.. God, give me strength to stay up late, and wake up earlier 2mmrw. 2 HARI LAGI!

ud lamaa..

2008-12-09T13:23:00.000+07:00

huaaa. ud lama bgt ga ngisi blog. Rite now, im on my way to Jakarta. Mw blikin form marnath.. Yup, bntr lg mw kuliah. Wah, ga krasaa. Pheew, big responsibility and preasure. Haha.. I hope there's no traffic. :)

don't wanna lose you..

2008-06-13T09:47:00.000+07:00

weeww.. takut bgt ni.. tar malem gw mw di 'sidang' ma bokap. o'oww~ mampui dah. mudah2an tidak terjadi hal yg tidak diinginkan deh. tpi ga tw jg nti gmn. psti marah besar.. bisa2 hp + laptop gw ditarik lg. T.T
ga maauuuu! tpi mw gmna lg, prepare for the best, ready for the worst.

congrats bwt chey, yg rapotnya ga ad merah! hehee.. & to angeline, yg gw ga smpet dtg ke farewell partynya.. soweee, dear bebb! wish u good luck di aussie yaa! bawain koala klo blik ke indo! heheee.. ^^